Complaint - is specific and limited to one situation, a wish that something was different. A specific complaint lets your partner know exactly were you stand on an issue.

Contempt - adds insult to criticism. Includes name-calling and accusing spouse of stupidity, incompetence, etc. Tone may be condescending, indicating that your partner is a simple child who needs to be shown, by you, what to do.

Criticism - is general and includes blaming your partner. Usually it will include words like "never" and "always." Everything is your partner's fault.

Withdrawal - occurs after excessively demanding, hostile or nerve-wracking relationships have become unbearable to handle; includes ignoring, not caring, apathy. One tends to withdraw from the emotional situation to avoid being hurt again.