Vocation to Love

Love must be the foundation for a successful marriage; love for God and love for your spouse.

Husbands and wives are called to love one another in the same way God loves each person.

When Jesus followers asked him what their first priority should be, He set a high standard:

Jesus said to him: 'You shall love the Lord your God with your whole heart, with your whole soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and first commandment.' The second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'
— Mt 22: 37-39, "NAB

Grounded in mutual respect and dignity, married love places the other person first. Since earliest Christian times, the believers have been counseled and challenged by the words of the First Letter to the Church at Corinth.:

Love is patient. Love is kind. Love is not jealous, it does not put on airs, it is not snobbish.
Love is never rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not prone to anger; neither does it brood over injuries.
Love does not rejoice in what is wrong but rejoices with the truth. There is no limit to love's forbearance, to its trust, its hope, its power to endure.
Love never fails.
—1 Cor 13:4-8a, NAB

Love is a decision, not an emotion

The couple is asked to enter into a covenant, a promise to seek an uncompromising, limitless love for each other.

This kind of pledge vows forgiveness before the fact, pledges faithfulness in the face of difficulties and growth, and commits oneself to investing in a new commitment to each new phase of married life.

Marital commitment is a bond that results in the fullness of love.
Feelings change; commitment to one another remains.

Three forms of love

EROS Love

Sexual love or desire
Self-preservation or continuation of the species

PHILOS Love

Brotherly/sisterly love
Friendship

AGAPE Love

Giving love
Altruistic, seeks the highest good for the other
Watches out for the needs of the other
Motivated by respect and consideration

All three kinds of love are required in marriage. In mature partners, these are not as much different kinds of loving, as they are diverse expressions of God's love.